A Little Complaining Does the Mind Good

You might ask why I am up right now.. this early, it’s 6:15am here in Mass. Well, it is because my joints and bones have been yelling for help the past 2 hours. Actually, not just yelling they are full out screaming. The pain I am in right now is agonizing, I don’t know how I’m really even thinking. Although my knees and hips are in the worst pain it’s all the way from my knuckles to my toes. It is more of an annoyance though because there is not a medication or anything that will make it go away. Rubbing and massaging my knees and legs helps, but it’s hard to have the patience to do it myself. I feel like an old woman, and if you are a Crohnie you know exactly what I’m talking about. It is probably my own fault though (in combination with getting ready for the clinical trial having to make myself sick basically) because I haven’t been taking my glucosamine and chondroitin, man that stuff is a miracle worker. I was on a good stretch of taking it but then sometimes popping huge horse pills every day can get just old. Until you soon remember the reason you started taking them in the first place that is..

I have been wondering, this is for my fellow IBD patients… I know joint pain is very, very common with IBD but do any of you get bone pain? When I say bone pain I’m talking a severe aching pain coming from inside of your bones. Yes it is as bad as it sounds. When I was on Tacrolimus I would get this agonizing bone pain and my doctor never had an explanation for (along with them not knowing a lot about a lot of the other side affects we have). I would be up all night long tossing and turning, face cringing, and sometimes even tears completely out of my control pouring out. I am not exaggerating on this one either.. It’d get so bad I’d make my boyfriend (at the time) stay up and rub my legs for hours (where can I find another one of those?! :p) My doctor then one day told me he read something about that medication causing bone marrow to swell and it would get worse with weight bearing. Which was exactly my case. This kind of made me cringe, I didn’t even know bone marrow could swell. But then again, pretty much anything in your body can. But I’ve been off of this medication for quite some time and I occasionally still get this awful bone pain, like right now as we speak. My doctor told me once it might be fibromyalgia… And I laughed in his face, not literally but I wanted to. I know that is just a label for people having pain that the doctors don’t know how to explain, he basically even told me that. Anyways, I’m starting to think it’s just the Crohn’s itself causing it. Any thoughts? 

This actually probably isn’t early for all of you other people out there who have work and are morning people, but not me. Not that I’ve ever been pregnant before but I could probably compare it to morning sickness.. It sucks. Most of the time I can’t eat till noon or later. thankfully this prednisone has kept my appetite. But some more complaints just because I’m pretty damn frustrated right now. I got this stupid itchy rash (assuming from the prednisone, I get it at least once every time I’m on it) so I stopped taking it for a couple days. Shhhh, my mom’s going to kill me. Consequently I started having bloody poo. Yeah disgusting. But this is probably the worst side affect I get. When it happens my stomach/abdomen area is in an awful amount of pain. As you could imagine, having canker-like sores all over your insides that are bleeding. Ouch. Well I decided to take 20mg of prednisone last night, rather than my usual 10mg, to kind of kick myself out of it. When I came off of it for a couple days it was pretty bad, not sickness wise, but the withdrawal side affects I’d like to call them, if that makes sense to you. It’s like my body is going through a withdrawal. Now, I know your not supposed to come right off of prednisone, but 10mg was a safe dose to do this from (just so you all know). I started getting acne like a 14 year old boy going through puberty… Not fun.. Or attractive. Hoping this 20mg will help a girl out and clear my skin up.

This post has been kind of boring but I felt the need to complain a little bit. Get it all out. Annnd I just had a hot flash.. Yeah prednisone does that to me. It’s amazing how fast the steroids actually work. This is kind of random but I’ve been thinking about how much my disease has evolved and changed over the years. Six years ago when I was in high school I had pretty much all different symptoms than I do now. It’s like an episode of NCIS where they think they have the killer the whole time but then realize it’s the wrong person. They have to solve the mystery all over again. I never had the pin point and all over pain in my stomach like I do now. I also never had as much nausea as I do now. It was more stomach aches, the sweats (I never showed a fever unless I was deathly ill because of all of the immune suppressants I was on), and lack of appetite. My joint pain wasn’t nearly as bad, but then again that probably gets worse with age.

Well, I’m getting pretty tired. Oh, I almost forgot! I have my first appointment to fill out paperwork, get blood work, and learn how the trial is going to work on Friday in Boston! I scheduled my fecal transplant for next week! Counting down the days to potentially feeling good, but not looking forward to that fun colonoscopy prep! *sarcasm* It will be one of two in a very short period of time. I hate those things. I’ll let you all know how it goes though! I’m going to try to get some more sleep and get my mind off of my aching limbs.

-xoMichelle

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